James Howe

There's a massive genre of “scary” book series out there, everyone from crippled Lincoln Rimes to the insufferably cheesy Anita Blake. This category is every bit as large in the Kids' Section, ranging from the pedestrian Goosebumps and R.L. Stine to even throwback Hardy Boys and their Title IX equivalent, young Nancy Drew.

You read the kids' books when you were younger. Maybe now you sneak a favorite from the adult section; maybe you don't even sneak, but wait breathlessly for Sue Grafton to get to “Z is for Zippo.” But have you ever thought about heading back to the Kids' section?

I recommend you do.

If you need an excuse, you should get these books for your nieces and nephews (reading them first, to make sure they are appropriate, of course). Or, just tell the teller or the library check out girl that's what you're doing. (This is especially good trick with the more beautiful library check girls, as it makes it seem like you take an interest in your younger family members, which of course makes you a more suitable mate for her, which might make her sleep with you. And you thought reading would never pay off...)

And just who is worthy of all this cloak and dagger? One James Howe, that's who. Perhaps—nay—without a doubt the best “scary” series you can find.

The first book (and all subsequent stories), “Bunnicula,” take place in the Monroe household, complete with mom, dad, two boys, a cat and a dog. In fact, before we even get to the story James Howe relates that while he is the listed author, the actual storyteller is Harold the dog.

Harold relates life in the Monroe house, which if fairly normal except for an extremely intelligent if rather paranoid cat (Chester), and of course a dog who can write a book. (Note: this is not a cutsie case of animals talking and such. These animals exist within their world the way all animals do, but are intelligent enough to talk to each other, write books, and most importantly, solve mysteries.

The very first mystery happens when the Monroes bring home a bunny from a bundle they find abandoned at a movie theatre. The movie? DRACULA. Add to that the bunny's strange markings, which look like a cape on the back of his neck, and rather pointed incisors, and the family names the rabbit “Bunnicula.”

Of course, Chester is convinced this is nor ordinary rabbit, and when vegetables start appearing in the crisper drained of all juice and with two strange puncture marks in each, Chester is convinced Bunnicula is actually that most fearsome of animals: a vampire-rabbit, or vamabbit.. (I just made that last term up, but you get the idea.)

Right now you're doing one of two things. You're either sitting there, chuckling to yourself, thinking, “I'd like to read these books, or um, er, get them for my cousin...” or you're dead to me. It's one or the other.

But it gets better!

“Bunnicula” is followed by “Howliday Inn,” when Chester and Harold are put in a kennel for the weekend. A Kennel where...there may be MURDER! Once again Chester is on the case, convinced there is a killer among them, and drags a protesting Harold to uncover the crime. The two make a great pair, with Chester a cross between Sherlock Holmes and Bucky Katt, while Harold is a most unwilling Dr. Watson. I'm not kidding when I say I have read this book at least 200 times.

Part Three gives us “The Celery Stalks at Midnight,” while the fourth book is “Nighty Nightmare,” two titles that may be familiar to those of you who showed up last week. (And for those who asked, Howe does not make up the catchy phrase “The Celery Stalks at Midnight,” but borrows it from this famous poem.) These two installments ratchet up the crazy but are no less entertaining.

And, I just found out there are 13 more books in the series I didn't even know about! I can't speak to their awesomeness, but I am stoked like a Franklin Stove to get my hands on them.

What I do know is that James Howe's series is major fun. Sure, it's written for kids, but there are plenty of jokes that would go right over their heads, and if you're the kind of person who doesn't enjoy a good story about a neurotic cat and his faithful friend, then I don't want to know you.